I found this somewhere:
A man was out in the wildness and he was hopelessly lost.It had been nearly 3 weeks since he had eaten anything besides what he could forage and he had been reduced to sleeping in caves and under tress.One afternoon, he came upon a really old mansion in the woods.It had vines covering most of it and the man could not see andy other buildings in the area.However,he saw smoke coming out of the chimney implying someone was home.He knocks on the door and it was openedby an old man, with a beard almost down to the ground.The old man squinted his eyes,"What doyou want?"The man replied, "I've been lost for the past 3 weeks and haven't had a decent meal or sleep since that time.I would be most grateful if i could have ameal nad sleep in your house for tonight."The old Chinese man said,"I'll let you come inon one condition:You cannot mess around with my grandaughter."The man, exhausted and hungry readily agreed,saying,"I promise i won't cause you trouble.I'll beon my way tomorrow morning."The old Chinese man countered,"Okay, but if I do catch you then I'll give you the three worst chinese
torture tests ever known to man"."Okay, okay,"the man said s he entered the old house.Besides, he thought to himself, what kind of woman would live out in the wildness all her life?Well,that night, when the man came down to eat after showering,he saw how beautiful the grandaughter was.She was an absolute pearl,and while he had only been lost 3 weeks,it had been many, many months without companoinship.And the girl had only seen occasional monk besides her grandfather and well;they
both couldn't keep their eyes off each otherthroughout the meal.That night,the man sneaked into the girl's bedroom and they had a quite time,but had kept the noise down to the minimum.The man crept back to his room later that night thinking to himself,"Any 3 torture tests would be worth it after that experience."Well,the next morning the man awoke to a heavy weight on his chest.He opened his eyes and there was this huge rock on his chest.On the rock was a sign saying,"1st Chines torture test:100 kg rock on your chest."."What a lame torture test,"the man thought to himself as he got up and walked over to the window.He opened the shutter and threw the rock out.On the backside of the rock was another sign saying, "2nd worst Chinese touture test:Rock tied toright testicle."The man,seeing the rock was too far out thewindow to grabbed,jumped out the window after the rock.Outside the window was the a third sign saying,"3rd worst Chinese torture test:Left testicle tied to the bedpost.